Watch Blake Shelton roast himself with hilarious Google search song

Blake Shelton is pulling back the curtain on the most private part of anyone’s life: their Google search history.

The “God’s Country” singer became the latest country star to try their hand at Jimmy Kimmel Live’s hilarious “Wing It & Sing It” segment, which sees a musician perform an absurd song live without ever seeing its lyrics beforehand. Shelton began the song, which was written on cue cards held up by host Jimmy Kimmel, by describing himself as a “curious man with a restless mind” before beginning to list off his alleged “Google search history” in wildly wonderful detail. 

“This is so stupid,” he confessed, before diving back into the song. “I looked up, ‘How to give myself a Rachel hairdo?’ And ‘Why did my testicle turn bright blue?’” 

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Shelton stumbled over admitting that he once asked Google how to fix his toilet, before declaring that he “did number two in the back of my truck” after the search engine didn’t give him the proper instructions on how to remedy the issue. 

“What should I do if I swallow a nickel?” he asked, trying to hide his laughter. “And ‘How do I know Elmo liked being tickled?’” 

After questioning whether or not Bigfoot would “kill or caress me” if they ever met, a large photoshopped image of Bigfoot with his arm slung over Shelton’s shoulders was superimposed on the screen behind them. “Can licking a bullfrog give me malaria?” he asked. “Are there any horny grandmas in my area?” 

The song even poked fun at Shelton’s marriage, with him supposedly searching “last minute birthday gifts for Gwen Stefani.” He continued, “Does Gwen like diamonds? Does she prefer pearls? And what the holy hell is a hollaback girl?”

The song then made its grand reveal. “I’m not vain or selfish or full of pride,” Shelton sang. “But at least three times a day I Google PEOPLE‘s Sexiest Man Alive… 2017… the year of the cock rooster.”

As the audience applauded and roses were thrown at him for his brave declarations, Shelton turned to Kimmel and added, “Thank you for that opportunity.”

Watch Shelton sing his search history in the clip above.