Do you think Marvel has like, one official black-market steroids provider, or is it in actor’s contracts that they have to find the good stuff themselves? Because at this point, there’s no point in arguing about whether or not the MCU is roided up. They are. The latest example of the “unbelievable” Marvel transformation comes via the oiled-up, hairless, shirtless form of Sacha Baron Cohen featured on the cover of Men’s Fitness U.K.
Cohen is currently slated to play Mephisto in the MCU, which will be one of the next major supervillains in that world. According to Deadline, to prepare for the role, Cohen asked the very muscled Matthew McConaughey for the number of a trainer who could get him in shape quickly, and who could do it while he was filming.
The trainer, Alfonso “The Angry Trainer” Moretti told Men’s Fitness U.K. that Cohen “looked like a ruler, straight up and down,” though the actor was “an athlete in hiding.” But I reserve the right to hold skepticism that a man in his 50s got the “Thor” look from a steady diet of high protein, functional strength training and time under tension.
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Never one to let someone else make the joke first, Cohen made some self-deprecating jokes about his physical transformation on Wednesday as well. “This is not A.I.,” he posted on his Instagram Stories. “I am really egotistical enough to do this.”
Does beating everyone to the punch change anything? Not sure. He joked about how he got the results too. “Some celebs use Ozempic, some use private chefs, others use personal trainers,” Cohen wrote on social media. “I did all three.”
That said, there’s obviously another factor contributing to Cohen’s cut: The man is freshly divorced. He and his wife of over a decade, Isla Fisher, officially divorced in June. Even if he wasn’t entering the never-ending superhero-industrial complex, a split like this would be enough explanation. Appearing to have a crisis of masculinity is a rite of passage for divorced actors of a certain age.
A smattering of other examples: There’s Brad Pitt’s GQ cover, where he looked like a fisherman who robbed a Diesel store, and also Ben Affleck’s GQ cover, which includes the most “I’m divorced” beard of all time. Honestly, it’s just surprising Cohen didn’t do his Divorced Guy photoshoot for GQ. The magazine has really been owning both the production of Divorced Guy content and the cultural commentary surrounding the memeification of Divorced Guys for the last decade.
As long as Cohen doesn’t go as far as Pitt did — i.e., turning into a horrendous self-insert about how you’re just a chill guy that nobody understands — the muscles shouldn’t be too much of a thing. Getting shredded after a very public end to your marriage is one of the best Divorced Guy behaviors out there.
Just make sure to keep stretching. High stress movements are killer on the joints.
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