Comedy

Perfectly Preserved 250-Year-Old Cherries Found At Mount Vernon

Dozens of bottles of cherries discovered by archaeologists in the cellar of George Washington’s mansion Mount Vernon were found to be perfectly preserved despite being more than 250 years old, and the Department of Agriculture is now investigating the ancient pits to see if they can be planted. What do you think?

“This is how Jurassic Park started.”

Alice Fresnu, Fad Developer

“Remind me never to eat at the Department of Agriculture.”

Ben Maxey, Cafeteria Chef

“Did they find any cheesecake down there?”

Dylan Tozzi, Chess Referee


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