DALLAS—Facing serious consequences for multiple violations of the league’s HR guidelines, local NFL referee Greg Clancy reportedly came under fire this weekend for watching pornography on his work instant replay device. “Unfortunately, Mr. Clancy was caught using his device for inappropriate conduct in a blatant breach of the employee code prohibiting pornography in the workplace,” NFL representatives said in an official statement that described how Clancy’s indiscretions were initially flagged via a virus downloaded from an adult website called XXXFL.net, along with accusations of delayed penalty calls, multiple incidents of explicit videos flashing on the Jumbotron screen for brief moments, and a tendency for the referee to take the instant replay device with him into the stadium bathrooms for long stretches of time. “When we intercepted several messages from his device from a hot, horny MILF who lives nearby, it became clear that Clancy was abusing his work technology for personal sexual gratification. Even worse, Clancy would call over other officials, urging them to ‘check this out.’ This breach of conduct has no place in the NFL, especially from those responsible for enforcing the rules, and he will be disciplined accordingly.” At press time, authorities confirmed that the referee would be placed under a supervision plan and watched over by an HR representative during all upcoming games.
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